Well, I have to say...being pregnant is very interesting.
It's joyous, cause everyday I remember- oh my gosh! I'm growing a person, my child! It's a miracle!
Nothing quite makes me believe in God...like growing a human being in my body.
It's also terrifying. I have days where I am so nervous. I constantly worry that this really isn't happening, or that it's going to be over anyday now. I don't think I'll stop worrying until the end (and probably for everyday till I die).
I have felt the baby move! Not every day, and mostly when I am very still for a long amount of time. I'll feel this little flutter. And I am told that is the baby :)
I wish I could have a doctor appointment everyday to hear the heartbeat. I hear that you can buy your own doppler (and I haven't just heard this I've researched it), and I actually consider getting one all the time, but it's pretty expensive and I should just have faith and wait till my monthly appointment.
Incase anyone is wondering how this works with Lyme and such, a few things should be noted.
We have a marvelous medical professional who understands our situation, and made the time and effort to make a phone appointment with Dr Jones (east coast, big wig Lyme Doc) to discuss Lyme pregnancy protocol. She discussed it with him and has prescribed me the medications needed to minimize the risk of passing.
The research shows that if you are on 2 antibiotics from before conception, and through your pregnancy, the chance of passing lyme is less than 1%. I am on these very antibiotics they suggest, and have been since before conception.
We also have me on a pretty strict diet. I only eat processed sugar once a week at the most, and I still limit my gluten to once or twice a week. I eat whole foods for breakfast and lunch everyday of the week, and my dinners are mostly healthy, though I do cave sometimes and get Little Caesars...or Taco Bell...or something like that!
We will have the cord blood tested immediately for Lyme and go from there!
All of this...is done with the hope that our baby doesn't get Lyme :) If it does get Lyme, well, that will be a whole new discussion for me and Clay.
I'm going to be honest with you too..because I feel like this was a direct blessing from God. Clay and I didn't get pregnant on our own, and there wasn't really an explanation for it. We tried and tried, and the doctor essentially said after analyzing our test results that he couldn't see a reason we wouldn't be getting pregnant after how much time had passed. We then went to a clomid and IUI combination. You can look those things up if you don't know what they are. But one thing to know about IUI's is, the sperm is washed before it is inserted to my uterus.
What I later found out was that HIV positive patients often use IUI's to help them get pregnant without passing to a baby HIV. The washing of the sperm lowers the risk significantly. Both Lyme and HIV are infections diseases, and therefore one would deduce that the wash would help Lyme passing go down as well. Overall, I felt a great peace when I read about that...that this was all meant to be and that the IUI was always in our plan, to help with the Lyme issue.
Anyhow, maybe you can see why I get so worried. It took so much to get here, and there is so much I feel like we have to lose. Pray for my nerves will ya!
Overall we are so happy. All the time we just look at each other and smile and say, we are having a baby!!! It really is a joyous time :)
Great blog. I think I knew all that but it was good to read it all at once at the same time. I am SO HAPPY for you and Clayj!!! And being nervous whether the baby is okay in general I think is a very normal thing. I always worried until I could feel the baby move on a regular basis. And if for some reason the baby was particularly quiet, I would get scared and pray that the baby would move, which it would and I would be okay. I am so happy that you go such an understanding doc that would talk to DR Jones. We are so excited!! Will pray that you can be calm and at peace. love you!!
ReplyDeleteThat's so cool you felt the baby! Mine has been wierd, I just feel pressure, no kicks. And I've gone back and forth between thinking it's the baby, or thinking my body just feels wierd. I've never had very active babies in utero. But that's really cool. I actually HAVE a fetal doppler! I wish I could just send it to you! I guess maybe I could. I almost never use it. I didn't remember it being expensive, but I couldn't find a cheap one for you. Sorry you are so stressed. I was a lot with Scarlet, not with Brighton. I think it's easier once you get one out safely. And for the forever till you die stress, that, for me went away with her first birthday. But I was pretty panicky until then. Again, not with Brighton. I almost fear for the next one. I will be the most careless yet! You just keep seeing that they don't die, and keep surviving- after you find a marble, or a tiny rubber ball IN THEIR MOUTH, or they DO start choking on food- EVERY MEAL and somehow they just still survive and it makes you start to think they're invincible. This probably sounds like terrible parenting.
ReplyDeleteWith my babies I had moments of worrying whether everything was okay. I would be safe probably in saying that all moms have those moments. You're not alone in thinking that. I love medical advances that make what may have been the nearly impossible years go, possible today. That the odds of having a healthy baby are super high. Total naive question, is breastfeeding possible with Lyme? Can it get passed on through milk?
ReplyDeletethat is SO AWESOME! That was totally meant to be! that is amazing. I am so happy for you guys. I wish I were rich so i could spoil you guys rotten with all the baby things you could ever want! And I know you don't care about that, I'm just so excited for you guys! love you!
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